# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
This is the high leading the old right now
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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