Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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