whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
