Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
you had me at cake vodka
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
