I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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