he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
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You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
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The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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