You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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