Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
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