Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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