I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
My feet surprised me
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