haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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