Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
We got so high we made milksteak
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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