I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
