She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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