she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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