just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
That's how pantless uber rides happen
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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