its not stalking. its research.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
