FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
