Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
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