she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
