I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
