Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
