I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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