last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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