this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
