He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
