god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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