Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
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