if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Randomize