do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
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And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
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I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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