they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize
