Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
