Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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