Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
