New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
