Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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