i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
