please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize