The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
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