dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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