did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Randomize
