There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
