you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I think I have vodka in my lungs
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
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