it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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