The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Randomize
