Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
