is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
