Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
