I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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