I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
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Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
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I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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