I think my fart just growled at me.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
