STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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