Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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